Wild Asparagus Is Kinda the Coolest Thing Ever

There’s wild asparagus growing in my boyfriend’s backyard. You probably don’t understand how cool I think this is. But let me try to explain… I write love letters to beets. There is not one single vegetable that I don’t adore. Tubers, stems, bulbs, leaves, buds, sprouts, roots: if it’s edible and roots in the dirt than I will eat it, and in abundance. I may very well have an artichoke heart for a heart.

So wild asparagus would not be more appreciated than by me, a discerning veg-epicurean active in the Locavore and Smug Self-Satisfavore movements. Asparagus, my princely stem shoot, I will cut you and eat you and this is not a threat… but your destiny.

Look at this sturdy shoot.

Hacked from the Earth and ready for a ride on mass-transit.

Blanched because there is no use in getting too fancy, I eat my veggies.