In Memoriam: Robbie

As I drove home from my birthday excursion, I found out my cousin had died suddenly–a massive heart attack at age 45. The shock has since given way to confusion and more heartache. 2020 continues to upheave.

The philosophical and theological rumination that can only be born of close contact with loss has delivered me to a very different mindset. Perhaps this becomes adulthood, watching those around you disappear as time marches its careless stomp, slowly losing faith that the world makes any kind of sense. You wind up settling on cliches, often spoken, but now felt deeply within your heart: You may lose your loved ones suddenly. Celebrate your favorite people in the living. You can’t squander the time you have. Etc.

Robbie, as my side of the family called him, was a force. The kind of man that could easily have a meaningful conversation with anybody–people might call him a “good guy,” but it was more than that. He was very special. He had an equability about him that wasn’t without sharp perception, but because of it. It’s kind of hard to explain, like the best people. We didn’t see each other a lot, but this evening–our Cousins Reunion, mid-karaoke jam–contained enough spirit and fun to hold us over for years. We spoke of getting together again “after Covid.” Is there an “after Covid”?

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I am thinking of Robbie and Ellen, as I fill in the bubble on this Election Day. Both passionate defenders of good sense and equality, I know if they could (or can) they’ll be watching to see how things turn out. And if they could (or can) watch the results of election, may they also see or feel or know how much they are loved.

To honor Robert and to help with his daughter’s education, there is a Memorial Fund set up.

Additionally, loved ones are collecting for a Memorial Bench in Colonial Park in Somerset, New Jersey, where he led hikes.